Comebacks at Work: Using Conversation to Master Confrontation

Hardcover
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Author: Kathleen Kelley Reardon

ISBN-10: 0061771023

ISBN-13: 9780061771026

Category: Conversation -> Technique

The workplace guide to putting "I wish I'd said" moments in the past\ \ Ever wish that you could have a "do over" after a conversation at work? Do you often find yourself regretting what you've said to a coworker—or kicking yourself for not saying something better, stronger, or more precise? If so, you're like most people, and in Comebacks at Work, management professor and consultant Kathleen Kelley Reardon, Ph.D., provides the tips and tools you need to know what to say—and how to say it...

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The workplace guide to putting "I wish I'd said" moments in the past Ever wish that you could have a "do over" after a conversation at work? Do you often find yourself regretting what you've said to a coworker—or kicking yourself for not saying something better, stronger, or more precise? If so, you're like most people, and in Comebacks at Work, management professor and consultant Kathleen Kelley Reardon, Ph.D., provides the tips and tools you need to know what to say—and how to say it better—next time. In this compelling, entertaining book, Reardon argues that we are responsible for 75 percent of the way we're treated at work, and our success—or failure—at the workplace depends largely on how we handle ourselves in conversation with our colleagues. To break free of the stale scripts and expected actions that allow politically astute people to manipulate us, we must increase our conversational awareness and effectively employ what Reardon calls "comebacks." Comebacks at Work provides a game plan for doing so and explains: Why some comebacks work, while others fall flat; Why our mind goes blank when we are confronted, and how to overcome that response; How to determine which comebacks work, and when to use them. Every conversation is different, and while many situations are common, one set of comebacks isn't enough. Offering a personalized repertoire of comebacks and a plan for using them strategically as well as the skills you will need to package them for maximum effect, Comebacks at Work will prepare you for any difficult conversation that comes your way. Publishers Weekly A handbook for anyone who’s ever walked away from a work confrontation, fuming--only to think of the perfect rejoinder an hour later. Reardon (The Secret Handshake) breaks down the “art of the comeback,” emphasizing preparation, keeping your cool, and handling conflicts with a carefully thought-out strategy, pointing out that each of us is at least 75% responsible for how people respond to us. She helps readers change their mindsets, getting past the mental models learned early in life that we later use for dealing with emotional or threatening issues at work. Through a thorough briefing of the different kinds of bullies we might face at work--the puppeteer, the complainer, etc.--and strategies for telling when it’s best to walk away and when it’s time to engage, she guides readers to self-discovery and skills, from honing their gut instincts to mastering facial expressions and gestures needed to overcome “comeback brain freeze.” A lively, encouraging book, bound to banish l’esprit d’escalier forever. (Oct.)

Author's NoteIntroduction The Art of the Comeback 1Chapter One Why Communication Matters 5Chapter Two Getting Started 11Chapter Three Assessing Your Baseline Comeback Skill 29Chapter Four The Perils of Patterns 51Chapter Five Overcoming Comeback Brain Freeze 71Chapter Six Choosing a Relevant Comeback 87Chapter Seven The Gut Check 123Chapter Eight When Conflict Is Inevitable 139Chapter Nine Pulsing the Other Person 159Chapter Ten Assessing the Situation 177Chapter Eleven Ten Questions to Ask Yourself 195Conclusion A Few Final Thoughts 213Acknowledgments 217Notes 219Index 225

\ Publishers WeeklyA handbook for anyone who’s ever walked away from a work confrontation, fuming--only to think of the perfect rejoinder an hour later. Reardon (The Secret Handshake) breaks down the “art of the comeback,” emphasizing preparation, keeping your cool, and handling conflicts with a carefully thought-out strategy, pointing out that each of us is at least 75% responsible for how people respond to us. She helps readers change their mindsets, getting past the mental models learned early in life that we later use for dealing with emotional or threatening issues at work. Through a thorough briefing of the different kinds of bullies we might face at work--the puppeteer, the complainer, etc.--and strategies for telling when it’s best to walk away and when it’s time to engage, she guides readers to self-discovery and skills, from honing their gut instincts to mastering facial expressions and gestures needed to overcome “comeback brain freeze.” A lively, encouraging book, bound to banish l’esprit d’escalier forever. (Oct.)\ \