I Thought My Father Was God: And Other True Tales from NPR's National Story Project

I told the listeners that I was looking for stories. The stories had to be true, and they had to be short, but there would be no restrictions as to subject matter or style. What interested me most, I said, were stories that defied our expectations of the world, anecdotes that revealed the mysterious and unknowable forces at work in our lives, in our family histories, in our minds and bodies, in our souls . . . I was hoping to put together an archive of facts, a museum of American reality.\ More than ever, I have come to appreciate how deeply and passionately most of us live within ourselves. Our attachments are ferocious. Our loves overwhelm us, define us, obliterate the boundaries between ourselves and others. —from the Prologue\ So there was Mr. Bernhauser yelling at us to get the hell out of his tree, and my father asked him what the problem was. Mr. Bernhauser took a deep breath and launched into a diatribe about thieving kids, breakers of rules, takers of fruit, and monsters in general. I guess my father had had enough, for the next thing he did was shout at Mr. Bernhauser and tell him to drop dead. Mr. Bernhauser stopped screaming, looked at my father, turned bright red, then purple, grabbed his chest, turned gray, and slowly folded to the ground. I thought my father was God. That he could yell at a miserable old man and make him die on command was beyond my comprehension. —Robert Winnie Bonners Ferry, Idaho

IntroductionThe Chicken3Rascal4The Yellow Butterfly6Python7Pooh9New York Stray11Pork Chop12B14Two Loves16Rabbit Story17Carolina19Andy and the Snake21Blue Skies24Exposure25Vertigo27Star and Chain33Radio Gypsy34A Bicycle Story36Grandmother's China39The Bass41Mother's Watch44Case Closed46The Photo47MS. Found in an Attic49Tempo Primo50A Lesson Not Learned52A Family Christmas52My Rocking Chair55The Unicycle57Moccasins59The Striped Pen61The Doll63The Videotape66The Purse68A Gift of Gold70Rainout75Isolation76Connections78The Wednesday Before Christmas80How My Father Lost His Job82Danny Kowalski85Revenge87Chris89Put Your Little Foot92Aunt Myrtle95American Odyssey97A Plate of Peas99Wash Guilt101Double Sadness103A Picture of Life106Margie109One Thousand Dollars111Taking Leave114Act of Memory120Bicoastal125A Felt Fedora126Man vs. coat127That's Entertainment128The Cake129Riding With Andy131Sophisticated Lady132My First Day in Priest Clothes133Jewish Cowboy134How to Win Friends and Influence People135Your Father Has the Hay Fever136Lee Ann and Holly Ann139Why I Am Antifur140Airport Story142Tears and Flapdoodle144The Club Car146Bronx Cheer148One Day in Higley150Dancing on Seventy-fourth Street153A Conversation with Bill154Greyhounding156A Little Story about New York159My Mistake162No Forwarding Address164The New Girl165The Iceman of Market Street168Me and the Babe171Lives of the Poets172Land of the Lost173Rainbow175Rescued by God177My Story179Small World183Christmas Morning, 1949186Brooklyn Roberts188$1,380 per Night, Double Occupancy190A Shot in the Light195Snow202The Fastest Man in the Union Army207Christmas, 1862208Mount Grappa210Savenay212Fifty Years Later213He Was the Same Age as My Sister214Betting on Uncle Louie216The Ten-Goal Player218The Last Hand220August 1945222One Autumn Afternoon224I Thought My Father Was God226The Celebration228Christmas, 1945230A Trunk Full of Memories232A Walk in the Sun235A Shot in the Dark237Confessions of a Mouseketeer239Forever241Utah, 1975243What If?247The Mysteries of Tortellini249An Involuntary Assistant251The Plot253Mathematical Aphrodisiac255Table for Two257Suzy's Choosy259Top Button260Lace Gloves262Susan's Greetings263Edith264Souls Fly Away267Awaiting Delivery269The Day Paul and I Flew the Kite270A Lesson in Love272Ballerina274The Fortune Cookie276Ashes279Harrisburg281Something to Think About283Good Night285Charlie the Tree Killer287Dead Man's Bluff288My Best Friend290I Didn't Know291Cardiac Arrests293Grandmother's Funeral294High Street296A Failed Execution297The Ghost299Heart Surgery301The Crying Place302Lee303South Dakota305Connecting with Phil308The Letter310Dress Rehearsal312The Anonymous Deciding Factor3154:05 a.m319In the Middle of the Night320Blood321T321 Interpretation of Dreams322Half-Ball323Friday Night325Farrell327"Jill"329D-day330The Wall331Heaven333My Father's Dream335Parallel Lives337Anna May340Long Time Gone342Sewing Lessons347Sunday Drive350Mayonnaise Sandwiches354Seaside355After a Long Winter358Martini with a Twist359Nowhere362Where in the World Is Era Rose Rodosta?363Peter365Early Arithmetic368Reflections on a Hubcap371Homeless in Prescott373Being There376An Average Sadness378Index of Authors381

\ From Barnes & NobleFamed author Paul Auster presents 180 of the "true tales" from National Public Radio's monthly National Story Project series. The vividly personal biographies come from men and women of every conceivable background and cover more than 40 U.S. states. The accounts are short but powerful; they include everything from amusing misunderstandings to heartbreakingly tragic moments. The result is nothing less than what Auster himself describes as "an archive of facts, a museum of American reality."\ \ \ \ \ From the Publisher“A powerful book, one in which strangers share with you their darkest secrets, their happiest memories, their fears, their regrets. To read these essays is to look into hearts, to see life from other viewpoints, to live vicariously.” —The Boston Globe\ “Unforgettable testimonials of human resilience. Moving and amusing dispatches from across America.” —Us Weekly (starred review)\ “Human foibles and frailties, laughter and tears...We are all hearing—and telling—stories all the time, especially now, in these days when life itself seems so fragile and precious. But Paul Auster’s wonderful efforts, choosing these fine stories, have given us a timely and invaluable reminder of what it means to listen—to really listen—to America talking.” —The Times-Picayune (New Orleans)\ “Finally, a bathroom book worthy of Pulitzer consideration: the one-to-three-page stories gathered in this astonishing, addictive collection are absolute gems.” —Publishers Weekly (starred review)\ “It is difficult to think of another book published this year, and probably any book to be published next year, that is so simple and so obvious, so excellent in intention and so elegant in its execution, and which displays such wisdom and such knowledge of human life in all its varieties. It is also difficult to think of a book that is so stark a reminder that human experience can be horrid and utterly unbelievable, and which therefore answers so precisely to our current needs and circumstances.”—The Guardian (UK)\ “As this collection ably proves, we all shape experience into stories, and Auster has done a storyteller’s job himself of grouping these pieces effectively. Highly recommended.” —Library Journal (starred review)\ “Like no other book I have read in years, this one restored my belief in Americans and the American experience.” —Philip Levine, Ploughshares\ \ \ \ From The CriticsTwo years ago, on National Public Radio's "Weekend All Things Considered," Auster introduced the National Story Project. In an attempt "to put together an archive of facts, a museum of American reality," he welcomed anyone to submit a story, following two rules: it must be true and it must be short. This book collects 179 stories-Auster calls them "reports from the frontlines of personal experience"-picked from over 4,000 entries. There is the unassuming yet beautiful portrait of a summer afternoon in a 1960s Manhattan neighborhood; the story of a man given leave after fifteen years in prison to attend his grandmother's funeral; and a homeless woman's account of her living situation. There are impossible coincidences, eerie omens and visions, and tales of love and war and family and death. \ —Ted Waitt \ \ \ \ \ \ \ Publishers WeeklyThis is a moving collection of stories that realizes the audio format's best possibilities. Culled from a collaboration between novelist Auster (Leviathan) and National Public Radio's All Things Considered, these slices of the American experience are real-life tales from people all over the country on a range of subjects. Since Auster himself selected the stories, it's no surprise that they echo his own approach while reading them: comfortable and emotive, with dexterous use of the power of understatement. Auster's tone is engaging, if a bit mellow, but what comes across more than anything is his genuine concern for the stories themselves and his belief in their merits. He keeps his dramatization to a minimum in order to let those merits shine through, and the recording is sure to leave listeners alternately smiling, nostalgic or melancholic. Even if a particular piece doesn't strike a chord, listeners won't be disappointed for long, as one of the production's finer points is its variety. Each tale lasts only a few minutes, but many of the images linger much longer. And because the stories were originally intended for radio, this is one instance where the audio is preferred over the print version. Based on the Holt hardcover (Forecasts, June 4, 2001). (Sept.) Copyright 2001 Cahners Business Information.\ \ \ \ \ Library JournalIn 2001, when NPR asked Auster to become a regular storyteller on Weekend All Things Considered, he wasn't interested. Then his wife suggested that he ask people to send him their stories to read on the air, and a few months later the National Story Project with was born. From some 4000 stories, Auster has selected 179, grouping them in loose categories: animals, objects, families, slapstick, strangers, war, love, death, dreams, and meditations. All are short, all are true, and they can be sad, hilarious, or both at the same time. In the title piece, Robert Winnie's father tells someone to drop dead and he does! In another, a grandson who has made his grandmother furious hears his grandfather tell him, "You are my revenge." Others tell of impossible coincidences, difficult lives, and wonderful comebacks. As this collection ably proves, we all shape experience into stories, and Auster has done a storyteller's job himself of grouping the pieces effectively. Highly recommended for public libraries. [Previewed in Prepub Alert, LJ 5/1/01.] Mary Paumier Jones, Westminster P.L., Westminster, CO Copyright 2001 Cahners Business Information.\ \ \ \ \ School Library JournalAdult/High School-Auster was on the verge of saying no to an offer to tell his own stories on the air when a chance remark by his wife changed the complexion and ultimately the direction of a National Public Radio project. She suggested that listeners be invited to make submissions. With that, the remarkable National Story Project was born. The rules were relatively simple; the stories had to be true and they had to be short. Four thousand people sent in their work. After just a few months, it became evident to Auster that too many good stories were coming in and that a book would be necessary to do justice to the project. He chose what he considered to be the best-179 pieces, written by individuals ranging in age from 20 to 90, from all walks of life, and touching on everything from the amazing to the poignant. Readers will turn pages to see if the next story is just as memorable as the one before, and it is. This is a wonderful book about some incredible people, to enjoy and to share with others.-Peggy Bercher, Fairfax County Public Library, VA Copyright 2002 Cahners Business Information.\ \ \ \ \ Kirkus ReviewsA collection of vignettes from the American stew pot, written for broadcast on National Public Radio by men and women from every racial, cultural, and economic stratum. Auster, who proposed the National Story Project in 1999 and has been reading the results on NPR ever since, has received more than 4,000 submissions since the project began. He culled 179 of them for this volume, few more than two or three pages long, some as brief as half a page. Placing no limits on subject matter, Auster asked his listeners only for anecdotes that "revealed the mysterious and unknowable forces at work in our lives." What he got were tales ranging from spectral apparitions in the bedroom to painful custody trials, with a preponderant emphasis on childhood memories. The collection he shaped from this material encompasses the comic and the tragic, the absurd and the surreal, the mundane and the ethereal. The title story, for instance, recounts a bizarre incident from the writer's youth, when his father in a burst of justifiable irritation told a cranky neighbor to "drop dead"-and the neighbor did. "The Chicken," which opens the collection, is a provocative six-sentence tale about a bird's adventure on the streets of Portland, Oregon. The volume is divided somewhat arbitrarily into 10 chapters, beginning with "Animals" and concluding with "Meditations"; "War," "Death," "Love," and "Slapstick" fall in between. The prose can be awkward, pretentious, or occasionally elegant, but for the most part it's simple and direct. "A Shot in the Light," for instance, relates the story of a man who was shot four times by a stranded motorist he had befriended. Victim and shooter survive, and the piece shows forgivenesson both sides, but the author makes no attempt to relate the incident to larger religious or political themes. Bedside fodder for general readers and a bonanza for fiction writers looking for core stories to launch a novel. Author tour\ \ \ \ \ Sunday Oklahoman“A wonderful story collection...and something that would make a great gift for the holidays.”\ \