Jacked Up: The Inside Story of How Jack Welch Talked GE Into Becoming the World's Greatest Company
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“Shockingly informative, unexpectedly funny, and a surprisingly good read about Welch’s tenure as GE’s CEO and CRO (chief rhetoric officer).” -Strategy + Business magazine When it comes to leadership, DO YOU KNOW JACK? NO MORE REPORTS:Jack got quiet for nearly a full minute, and stared down at the table with the semi-scowl that meant some kind of processing was going on. Then he said, loudly and decisively:“No, no, no! We’re not doing this any more. No more ‘reports.’ We’re sick of reports. The only pitches that are worth anything are when you tell people what they ought to do. Otherwise it’s just a waste.”And so it began, gradually, that GE began to move from a self-absorbed corporation to what Welch would later describe with much pride as “a real learning company.”A SHOUT FROM THE BATHROOM:One day Jack brought a copy of a letter he had been sent. It was written by one of our very senior business leaders “explaining” some Corporate initiative. The letter made no sense, and Jack read passages of it aloud, with inflections that emphasized the absurdities in what the man had written. Finally he stopped laughing long enough to render his final criticism.“It’s like something he yelled out the bathroom door to his secretary while he was sitting on the can. That’s it exactly. This is a shout from the bathroom.”THIS IS JACK: UNCENSORED, IRREPRESSIBLE, AND UNBEATABLEBill Lane joined GE as a speechwriter in 1980, after seven years at the Pentagon. From 1982 to 2001, he was Manager, Executive Communications for the Company, and Jack Welch’s speechwriter.
Introduction xiPart ITorched by an A-Hole 1Retiring But Not Shy 5Reflections of a Pimp 11Bore Wars: Chet Lang and the Big Bang 13Death of a Pitchman 17Part III Can't Deal with this Anymore 23Mike's Big Day 27Crotonville High 35Prior Planning Prevents Piss-Poor Performance 37Fred's Bad Day 39Triumphs, Train Wrecks, Coronations, and Jack's Biggest Miss 43You're Going Nowhere at GE Unless... 45How to Succeed in Business by Really Trying 49Love-or Hate-at First Sight 51The View from the Bowling Alley 55The Bogus Boca Presentation 61Died and Went to Headquarters 65Selling Hats to Each Other 69Part IIIThe Russians Are Coming 73Hectoring the Hobbit 77Movin' On, Sideways 79Death to Strategic Planning 83Blubbering on the Stand 85From Grunt to Flunky 87The Marionette Meister 95Jacking Up the Commo 101Don't Dive.Swim! 103Part IVRestuffing Guts 107Gentle Meddling 111Called on the Carpet 113More Change via Negative Reviews 117Takes One to Know One 119Dead Man Talking 121"Stop Construction Today" 123Every Biopsy Doesn't Have to Come Back Positive 127I'm Okay; You're an A-Hole 129Bulletproofing the Love-In 131Part VDeath by Presentation at NBC 137Peeing on the Kidder Body 141A Shout from the Bathroom 143The Wright Stuff (Righted) 147Diversity Is Our ... er ... Strength 149Part VIFly Ball at The Pierre 155Black Clouds Lift the Stock 163The Chairman and the Strawman 165Don't Screw This Up 169Don't Care About It? Don't Do It! 173The 110 Percent Solution and Jack's Perks 175Wanna Drink Lunch with Us? 181The Firing Squad 185Part VIIWhy Gary Wendt 191Lack of Care Packages 199Seinfeld in Fairfield: The Yogurt Incident 203Order and Logic Out of Chaos 205Doin' Time 209Better Than the Best 211Herb Smokes Jack; Warren Lurks in His Nightmare 213The Welch Work Ethic 217The First Through the Drapes 221Crotonville Turkey Shoot 225A Pad in Front of You 229Part VIIIIf Your Wife Thinks It's Boring, It's Boring 233Danger: Flying Carrot Fragments 237Ringo's Rule 239The Perfect Annual Report 243"Not a Pennyworth of Difference" 249Part IXBore Wars Continue ... 251Lloyd's Law: A Learning Company 257The Bore Test. Are You Relevant? 261Larry Leaves. Lane Grieves. (On the Way to the Bank) 263The Inevitable (But Very Short) Golf Section 269Tough Jack to Follow 271Know Your Potential Enemy 275Out of the Gate and Serious 277Part XTell Me a Story 281The Dogs Are Your Friends 285What You Face If You're Black, Asian, or a Woman 289Ten Minutes! No More! 293PowerPoint Is the Enemy. Never Surrender 297On Being a Leader Rather Than a Projector Operator 301Do It All in Five Charts 303At the End of the Day 307Love Story 311Final Thoughts 315Index 317Boring Acknowledgments Section 323
