My Smart Puppy with 60-Minute DVD: Fun, Effective, and Easy Puppy Training

\ \ My Smart Puppy\ \ \ \ By Sarah Wilson Brian Kilcommons\ \ \ Warner Books\ \ \ Copyright © 2006\ \ Brian Kilcommons and Sarah Wilson\ All right reserved.\ \ ISBN: 0-446-57886-X\ \ \ \ \ Chapter One\ \ \ THIS IS YOUR PUPPY! \ It is the evening on November 30, and we're about to get a new\ puppy! While scanning an Internet rescue site, a calm, intensely\ intelligent expression caught our eye. The fact that this puppy is\ also black, white, and tan, the color of our beloved late great\ Australian Shepherd, Caras, means we are hopelessly biased in her\ favor. Brian had to be in New York City on business, so I am driving\ out to Fishkill, New York, to meet this little one and her foster\ mother. As I pull into the parking lot of our meeting spot, I can\ see the puppy sitting next to a woman's feet. She is smaller than I\ thought, which is good. She sits there, watching the world parade\ by, neither leaping at passersby nor shying away. I like her from\ thirty feet away and it only gets better. Sidling up, ears back, she\ greets me softly, politely. She is incredibly cute. Once we've met,\ we go for a little walk together. She bounces everywhere without\ mouthing. When a shopping cart rumbles by, she startles then walks\ behind it, curious. Excellent! She is charming. She is adorable.\ Flipping open my cell phone, I place the call to Brian: She is\ perfect! And Pip has found her home.\ Dogs have entered our lives many ways. Brian got his Rottweiler,\ Beau,from a top show-dog breeder and judge. PJ, our "well-mixed"\ terrier, was a foster puppy who stayed. We found Caras in an ad in a\ dog magazine. Good dogs come from many places, each arriving with\ his or her own blend of instinct, personality, and experience. You\ and your puppy are embarking on an adventure, one that has been\ repeated millions of times over thousands of years and yet one that\ will be uniquely yours. If you pay attention on this trip, you will\ learn more than you ever expected about yourself, relationships, and\ communication. Where do we begin this journey? Where every such\ journey begins, with understanding the other. This chapter is about\ what you need to know about your puppy before you move forward with\ his or her education, socialization, or housebreaking.\ TEN KEYS TO UNDERSTANDING YOUR PUPPY\ 1. Each Puppy Is Different\ Even within a single litter of pups, there can be extreme\ differences, from outgoing and friendly to withdrawn and aloof. Are\ you and your siblings or cousins exactly alike? Neither are pups.\ This puppy of yours will be different from any dog you've had or\ will have. He has his own personality-with features that amuse and\ parts that annoy, a total package. And as the old saying goes, the\ trick to being happy is not to get what you want but to want what\ you get. Your job, as his leader, is to build on his strengths while\ minimizing his weaknesses.\ 2. Your Puppy Is Not a Blank Slate\ Your puppy arrives in your arms a package of instincts and hardwired\ behaviors. In some, those instincts/behaviors border on compulsions.\ Border Collies can stare obsessively at movement, Labradors may lose\ their minds over tennis balls, some Terriers bark almost nonstop.\ Your pup doesn't even, can't even, know there are other options.\ Saying "No" to a dog in the middle of an instinct-triggered behavior\ often doesn't help or if it does, it won't for long. "No" simply\ doesn't compute. "No" tells your puppy you are upset-nothing else.\ He needs alternatives, which you must supply. You must teach your\ Border Collie that he can look away, your Lab that he can leave the\ ball on the floor, your Terrier that he can sit quietly ... as\ these ideas will never, ever occur to them.\ 3. Your Puppy Needs More than "Love"\ Actually, love may be all your puppy needs, if love means meeting\ your puppy's emotional, mental, and physical needs, even when you\ don't especially feel like it. But if by "love" you mean meeting\ your emotional needs first and foremost, even when that conflicts\ with the puppy's needs, then that is not enough. What we say to\ clients is "Do you love your puppy or do you love loving your\ puppy?" If you love your puppy, doing what he needs is second\ nature. If you love loving your puppy, you will do what you want to\ do while complaining about your puppy. For example: Puppy urinates\ in kitchen overnight. Easy solution: Your puppy sleeps crated in\ your bedroom. If you love your puppy, you do that because you know\ it will help the puppy learn. If you love loving the puppy, you'll\ refuse to take that action because "you don't like crating her," and\ then you'll create a problem.\ 4. Minor Moments Matter\ Every interaction you have with your puppy teaches her something.\ There is no "small" interaction. If your puppy steps in front of you\ and you move out of her way to avoid bumping into her, she learns\ that she can make you move. If, instead, you kept your feet low,\ your knees bent, and shuffled on through her, she learns that you\ can make her move. You may think, Who cares? Your puppy does and\ therefore you must. In social mammals, leaders walk and followers\ get out of the way. This is true in people, horses, and dogs. Those\ many minor moments teach your puppy who you are. If you teach her to\ push you around, walk all over you, and ignore you, it can create\ problems later. People often say that problems "came out of the\ blue!" but they are often the result of months of dismissing or\ missing the meaning of those minor moments.\ 5. To See It Is to Mouth It\ Puppies explore their world with their mouths which, until about\ four months of age, contain tiny, pointy, needle-sharp teeth. Pups\ mouth things that move, like your cat or your pant leg. They gnaw on\ things with the same predictability with which young human children\ attempt to stick things up their nose. It's just going to happen at\ some point. This is not a "bad" puppy; this is a normal puppy. Plan\ for normal events to happen, so you can supervise, teach, and\ redirect to a better option. Avoid thinking that normal things like\ this won't happen and then being annoyed or surprised when they do.\ 6. Puppies Do Not Understand Risk\ First off, a three-month-old puppy has been on our planet for only\ ninety days or so. Nature has given him speedy mobility but little\ time for experience. You must protect your puppy as he will swallow,\ chew, leap off, and careen into slippery, sharp, and dangerous\ things. Sarah remembers all too well watching fivemonth- old\ Bracken, her German Shepherd Dog, race up the back steps and vault\ off the three-foot-high railing, arcing upward toward a bird on the\ back fence. As she landed she dropped some six feet or so to the\ ground without incident, but was that anticipated? No. You can never\ anticipate everything. So, when considering risk, ask yourself not\ what you think might happen, but what could happen.\ 7. Puppies Love Pleasing You\ Anyone who has ever seen a puppy sporting a delighted, openmouthed\ grin when his person praises him knows that dogs of all ages enjoy\ it when we enjoy them. They want that connection- it is one of those\ things that makes dogs dogs. They get a kick out of us!\ It is in vogue in some circles to talk about how dogs have no desire\ to please. We feel sorry that anyone in the dog community could live\ with dogs and not experience that warm, mutual connection. In some\ circles, touch and praise are billed as "distractions to learning."\ As if a relationship were a "distraction." We have dogs because of\ the mutual relationship we can share with them. What a sad, cold\ world it must be to treat a dog as if he is incapable of deep\ connection and to then be treated in the same way by the dog.\ My Smart Puppy people do not have to live in that distant world. You\ will build a relationship with your puppy, seeing his or her joy in\ our joy. In order to see this, you must learn how to praise your\ puppy warmly and sincerely in a way your puppy enjoys. Show your\ puppy through touch and voice just how fond of him you are and you\ will see him respond in kind.\ 8. Puppies Need Lots of Sleep\ Humans take around fifteen years to grow from infancy to sexual\ maturity. Your puppy does it in under one. She may start life at one\ pound and bite into her first birthday cake at seventy-five pounds.\ That is an extraordinary rate of growth. A large-breed puppy may, at\ the peak of growth, put on nearly a pound a day. To accomplish this\ feat, your puppy needs rest and a lot of it. Expect your puppy to\ log nearly eighteen to twenty hours a day for a few peak-growth\ months. Just like children, overtired puppies can become cranky,\ pushy, whiny, or otherwise frustrating.\ It is your job to recognize those signs and tuck the pup into his\ crate for a nap. This is especially important in households with\ children, where a puppy can be kept awake and active for too long.\ 9. Puppyhood Is Messy\ In every sense. Not only will you be dealing with physical\ byproducts- urine, feces, vomit, hair, dirt, and in some breeds\ drool-but learning is messy. Think how difficult it is to\ communicate clearly between people. Now try between species; you are\ trying to communicate with a species that has no clue about what\ you're trying to teach. Sometimes your puppy will be confused,\ sometimes you will be, sometimes you both will be-that is normal.\ The way through it is productive practice. Avoidance, frustration,\ or "putting it off" never trained a single puppy. You can do this!\ Nothing has to be perfect-as long as you are consistent and\ persistent, your puppy will learn to understand you.\ 10. Puppyhood Is Brief\ Hallelujah and darn-all at once. You would not be human if you\ didn't think from time to time, When will this end? We can tell you\ when it will end: very quickly. Use these months. You cannot ever\ get them back. Train, play, socialize, explore-prepare your puppy\ for a long, happy life as an adult dog. Along the way, take\ pictures, find ways to have at least a little fun with your puppy\ every day, and have patience with normal mental and physical canine\ developmental stages. They are as precious as they can be annoying.\ BRIAN'S INBOX:\ Do I Have to Be Dominant?\ I hear from people that I have to dominate my puppy. Is this true? I\ love my puppy and I don't want to be mean.\ Good! We don't want you to be mean either. We want you to be his\ best teacher. Think of the teachers you most respected in your life.\ What qualities did they have? Most people report that their best\ teachers had high expectations, were fair, funny, forgiving,\ reliable, sure of themselves, secure-wonderful attributes for good\ leaders. A good leader leads from a place of clarity plus calm\ confidence-not confusing, combative reactions. We'll teach you how.\ DOG-TO-HUMAN PICTIONARY\ Dogs "speak" clearly, though we humans do not always hear them. In\ our opinion, human lack of understanding causes many of the dog\ bites in the United States. If we "heard" dogs better, we would be\ bitten less. This section can save you and your loved ones from\ trouble with dogs. Our goal: to prevent the bite long before it\ happens. Please read it carefully, and look at the pictures, then,\ if you have questions, come to MySmartPuppy.com and ask!\ When reading any dog, check their T.E.E.T.H.:\ Tension, Ears, Eyes, Tail, Head\ MY THUNDER STANDINGS ABOUT DOG BODY LANGUAGE\ A Wagging Tail Is Always Happy\ This is usually true, but not always. A wagging tail, like the human\ smile, can mean many things. A tail that is straight up, stiff, and\ vibrating back and forth? That is excited and stimulated, but not\ "happy." This dog could be moments away from aggression. A tail\ tucked all the way under the dog's body could wag at the very tip.\ This dog is frightened but trying. Do not press her. A tail that\ wags level with the spine or a bit above or below spine level in\ large, sweeping wags? That is a happy dog.\ Showing Teeth Is Always a Threat\ Most of the time it is, but some dogs actually smile when they are\ excited to see someone. This is pretty disconcerting until you know\ what is going on. Breeds known for their toothy grins include\ Dalmatians, Doberman Pinschers, Australian Shepherds, and\ Greyhounds. If the dog's ears are back, the tail is wagging low, and\ you see a flash of front teeth, chances are you've just seen a grin!\ Hackles Raised Means the Dog Is Aggressive\ Hackles (the hair along the back) can piloerect (raise up) when a\ dog is excited and unsure. Sometimes it is a warning sign of\ aggression, but in puppies it is more often a sign of excitement,\ concern, or worry. Many dogs will hackle slightly (or not so\ slightly) when they enter a dog run, only to shake it off\ (literally- dogs often shake when they have calmed down a bit) in a\ few minutes before settling down to some serious play.\ Cowering "Proves" He "Knows What He Did Wrong"\ Nah, cowering "proves" he knows you are about to be angry, and those\ are two entirely different things. If your roommate came home once\ or twice a week, opened the door, and attacked you for no apparent\ reason, you might cower or leave the room when the door opened at\ night, too. That would not prove that you "knew what you did wrong."\ THIS IS YOU! HOW PEOPLE IMPACT PUPPIES\ Temperament is often in the eyes of the beholder. Variations in\ human temperament are numerous and affect how the puppy's\ temperament is perceived. One person's wonderfully "perceptive"\ puppy is another's "wimp." One "good watchdog" is someone else's\ "aggressive puppy." There are homes that will adore most puppies for\ who they are and homes that may dislike them for exactly the same\ reasons.\ Now, what about us? What do we bring to the table as teachers and\ trainers? To understand who you are likely to be as a teacher, look\ at how you were taught. Until we consider the impact of how we were\ taught, we often are left repeating or completely avoiding our\ history. Taking a look at our inner teaching model allows each of us\ to make better choices about how we want to behave as teachers.\ Example: We have a friend who attended a strict Catholic school\ where the nuns were harsh. If she didn't know an answer, she was\ punished. If she gave the wrong answer, she was punished. Since not\ knowing and giving wrong answers are a normal part of learning,\ normal learning was made frightening and stressful. How did that\ impact her as a trainer? She became increasingly anxious whenever\ the puppy did something "wrong." She was both quick to punish\ harshly and quick to have a growing sense of panic inside herself\ about not "doing it right" with her puppy. She didn't like being\ harsh, so she often felt helpless to control her puppy, allowing all\ sorts of behavior until she got frustrated and became harsh. The\ guilt was overwhelming. She would "apologize" to the puppy with\ excessive attention and asking for little in the way of self-control\ until the puppy's behavior frustrated her again and the cycle\ continued.\ When this cycle was brought to her attention, it was a huge relief\ for her. She was able to start making different choices: redirecting\ her puppy sooner, setting clear, unemotional boundaries regarding\ what she wanted and didn't want as well as taking a break when she\ felt the frustration welling up. Her puppy calmed down considerably.\ Life got a lot better for both of them.\ Is our friend a "bad" person? Not at all. We are all products of our\ history, but we don't have to be victims of it. We can learn to\ behave differently when we get support for doing so. There are no\ "perfect" puppies and there are no "perfect" puppy trainers. We're\ all just getting better and better as we go along. We all start as\ beginners. We all bring inner baggage-some of which makes us more\ effective and some of which makes us less. That is normal. Aim for\ steady progress and you'll do just fine.\ During Sarah's master's degree research, she found that often people\ seemed to define "loving" their pup as giving the puppy what that\ person felt they were missing in their own childhood. Example: If\ you were raised by busy parents, you may believe that giving the\ puppy buckets of attention is being "loving." Below is a quick\ overview of a few possibilities. We just wanted to give you a place\ to start thinking about these things.\ PUPPY PERSONALITY PROFILES\ Your new puppy is like no other-ever. She is her own special blend\ of behaviors, instincts, and tendencies. Understanding who she is\ makes it easier for you to be an effective leader who brings out the\ best she has to offer. Keep in mind that most puppies are a\ combination of temperaments. They may go through one (or more)\ changes as they mature and will display different personality traits\ in different situations. Your puppy who is Appropriate/ Social at\ home may be Sensitive/Shy the first week of puppy class. Your\ job-and it can be a challenging one-is not to judge these normal\ shifts but to help your puppy at whatever stage or phase she is in.\ Understanding a little about the major temperament categories will\ help you do that.\ (Continues...)\ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ Excerpted from My Smart Puppy\ by Sarah Wilson Brian Kilcommons\ Copyright © 2006 by Brian Kilcommons and Sarah Wilson.\ Excerpted by permission.\ All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.\ Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.\ \