Surviving Your Adolescents
Search in google:
A step-by-step approach to handling teenagers, this guide helps parents end the hassles and improve their parent-teenager relationship. Parents learn how to communicate with teenagers, how to manage teenage risk-taking, how to "let go" in certain situations, and when to seek professional attention. Concise and encouraging, this resource walks parents through the ups-and-downs of parenting teenagers as their kids push towards independence. VOYA Phelan, author of All About Attention Deficit Disorder (Child Management, 1996), begins with a clear introduction to basic adolescent psychology, with an emphasis on keeping MBAs-Minor But Aggravating behaviors-in perspective. He stresses the importance of communication between parents and teenagers and avoiding what he refers to as the Four Cardinal Sins: Spontaneous Problem discussions, Nagging, Insight Transplants (when parents expect their profound insights to be transplanted into the brain of their teen), and Arguing. By adopting these suggestions, parents can establish or repair positive relationships with their teens that will help them overcome the trouble spots. The next half of the book outlines a series of parental roles to deal with unacceptable behaviors, from Observing and Advising those MBAs, to Negotiating and Directing serious problems such as drug abuse. Phelan suggests two routes of Directing: the Major/Minor system (a penalty system set up in advance so teens know the consequences of irresponsible actions) and counseling, if all else fails or teens are putting themselves in extreme danger. Phelan reveals teens' various methods of Testing and Manipulation (buttering up, playing the martyr) and gives helpful guidelines in the last chapters for specific areas such as driving or school difficulties. Written in a friendly, approachable style, this book is full of practical advice for the overwhelmed parent of pre-teens and teens. It should be in every guidance counselor's office and public library.
