The Other Side of the Closet : The Coming-out Crisis for Straight Spouses and Families

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Author: Amity Pierce Buxton

ISBN-10: 0471021520

ISBN-13: 9780471021520

Category: Bisexuality in marriage

Candid, compassionate, authoritative--a rich source of insights, information, and practical guidance. "The first major work on the topic." --Gay Community News "A much needed comprehensive study of what happens to husbands, wives, and children during the coming-out crisis. --The Reverend Jane E. Vennard, founder Task Force for Spouses of Gays and Lesbians "The new enlarged edition adds important factors, especially children's reactions to a parent's coming out. Well-researched and...

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Candid, compassionate, authoritative—a rich source of insights, information, and practical guidance. "The first major work on the topic." —Gay Community News "A much needed comprehensive study of what happens to husbands, wives, and children during the coming-out crisis. —The Reverend Jane E. Vennard, founder Task Force for Spouses of Gays and Lesbians "The new enlarged edition adds important factors, especially children's reactions to a parent's coming out. Well-researched and insightful." —Fritz Klein, M.D., author of The Bisexual Option "Anybody practicing in this area would be well advised to read this book." —Professor Arthur S. Leonard, New York Law School In two million marriages, one spouse is gay, lesbian, or bisexual. Having a spouse or parent disclose his or her same-sex attraction is a shattering experience fraught with pain, confusion, anger, and a profound loss of self-esteem. Amity Pierce Buxton spotlights this exploding phenomenon and reports constructive coping strategies that spouses and children have used to resolve problems of sexual damage, family breakdown, deception, and homophobia. Illustrated throughout by riveting personal narratives, this expanded edition of The Other Side of the Closet traces the family's journey from initial trauma to eventual transformation. This invaluable source of information for spouses, families, and professionals is based on Dr. Buxton's eight years of research, including interviews with 1,000 straight spouses and children, her own personal experience, and her counseling work with spouses of gay, lesbian, and bisexual partners.

Introduction Coming Out in Marriage: The Untold StoryPt. 1Sexual Mismatch: Damaged Sexuality of the Straight Spouse1Pt. 2Trial and Error: Challenge to Traditional Marriage Styles37Pt. 3Growing Pains: Conflicting Roles as Parent and Spouse85Pt. 4What About Me?: Identity Crisis of the Straight Spouse139Pt. 5Power of the Lie: The Shattering of Integrity175Pt. 6Family Voices: Aftershocks in the Children's World215Pt. 7Breaking the Mold: Transformation of Shattered Belief System257Afterword: Beyond the Closet315Appendix A: Additional Readings319Appendix B: International Resources325Endnotes327