When Kids Are Grieving: Addressing Grief and Loss in School
This primer helps educators understand and respond appropriately to students’ unique expressions of grief, facilitate effective interventions, and determine when to refer a child to a specialist.
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Help students deal with grief and loss in appropriate, healthy ways.Most students experience some form of loss in their lives, and the resulting grief can profoundly affect their academic performance, emotional stability, and social interactions. Serving both as a resource and workbook, this reader-friendly primer helps educators and school counselors understand and respond to the extraordinary challenges that children and adolescents may face when dealing with loss and grief.Featuring helpful charts, quotes, activities, case studies, reproducible handouts, and resources from national organizations, this sourcebook offers strategies to help students affected by divorce; death of a parent, relative, friend, or pet; violence; chronic illness; and more. The author examines grief experiences at different developmental levels and illustrates how to:Respond appropriately to expressions of grief that are unique to children and adolescentsHelp students handle emotions associated with lossPromote communication and facilitate effective interventionsDetermine when to refer a child to a specialistRespect cultural attitudes toward loss and griefThis resource underscores the importance of understanding how children experience grief and loss and helps educators assist in ways that promote students emotional health and recovery.
Foreword Kenneth J. Doka viiiPreface xAcknowledgments xiiAbout the Author xiv1 Am I Qualified to Work With Grieving Children? 1Overview 1Self-Awareness 2Reflection Activity 6Case Study: How Do I Tell the Children? Part I 7Thought Provokers and Issues to Consider 7Chapter Reflection 8Key Terms 82 What Are the Different Types of Losses and Grief Reactions? 9Overview 9Dimensions of Loss 10Anticipatory Grief Versus Unanticipated Grief 15PRECEDENT: A Conceptual Framework for Understanding Grief Responses 17Thought Provokers and Issues to Consider 20Chapter Reflection 20Key Terms 213 What Do I Need to Know About Children's Grief? 22Overview 22Developmental Processes 23What and How Children Grieve 29Case Study: How Do I Tell the Children? Part II 31Gender Differences 35Thought Provokers and Issues to Consider 36Chapter Reflection 36Key Terms 374 What Do I Need to Know About Adolescents' Grief? 38Overview 38Developmental Processes 38Cognitive Factors 40Socioemotional Factors 40Family and Peers 42School, Media, and Technology 42How Teens Grieve 44Risk-Taking Behaviors and Suicide 45Suicide Prevention 46Case Study: Reactions to a Classmate's Suicide 48Thought Provokers and Issues to Consider 50Chapter Reflection 50Key Terms 515 What Can I Do to Help Grieving Students? 52Overview 52"But I'm Not a Grief Counselor ... " 52Things You Need to Know First 53Things You Can Do 54Rituals and Activities 56Cultural Considerations 58Humor 61Thought Provokers and Issues to Consider 65Chapter Reflection 65Key Terms 666 What Are the Elements of School-Based Crisis Response? 67Overview 67School-Based Crisis Response 67Crisis Response Team 68Skills and Training 69Types of Crises 70School Crisis Response Plan 71Crisis Postvention 72Thought Provokers and Issues to Consider 73Chapter Reflection 73Key Terms 747 What Grief and Loss Resources Should Our School Have Available? 75Overview 75National Association of School Psychologists (NASP) Resources 76Fernside and Banana Splits Resource Center Reading Lists 83Online Resources 89School Grief and Loss Resource Library 91Thought Provokers and Issues to Consider 92Chapter Reflection 92Postscript 93Glossary 95References 99Index 104
\ Steve Hoff"Burns provides an excellent, user-friendly guide to help school personnel navigate the tricky waters of child grief.This is a welcome resource for school professionals.”\ \ \ \ \ Heta-Maria Miller“The author’s sensitivity and understanding of cultural variations in reactions to loss provide a much-needed perspective to this important topic.”\ \ \ Marguerite G. Lodico"A significant resourcefor educators as they work with children and adolescents who are dealing with grief and loss.”\ \ \ \ \ Katherine H. Voegtle"Burns' book captures the wisdom, sensitivity, and gentle humor that she has used in a lifetime of work with grieving families. She teaches us to discover our own strengths as we mourn the people we have loved and lost.”\ \ \ \ \ Margaret M. Kirwin"Donna Burns has written an important book for practicing professionals, especially school professionals involved with grieving children and young adults. What is a matter for profound grieving by a young person may not be recognized among adults as an issue calling for sensitive support. And, symptoms of childhood and young adult grieving are often mistaken for other issues because young people are so often indirect in the ways they channel their grief. Burns provides an excellent resource for preventing traumatic grieving, recognizing youthful grieving as it occurs, and constructively responding to grieving youth at the individual, classroom, and school levels. This book provides an excellent knowledge base on the subject, and is also an invaluable reference volume that every educational professional would do well to own.”\ \ \ \ \ Daniel Doherty“The best guide to dealing with loss for children that I have read. The book teaches the counselor to use life experience tools in the healing process.”\ \ \ \ \ Stephen Birchak“For anyone dealing with grief, this book is priceless. It is perfectly suited for professionals as well as families dealing with this difficult issue. By far, it is one of the best books written on the subject because of the manner in which Burns compassionately combines human sensitivity with relevant theory and research. When you read this book, you never forget that first and foremost we are fragile human beings. Burns’ wisdom, insight, kindness, and love shines through on every page.”\ \
